Who needs the young?

As Mr. Cameron stays longer in power, the magic that’s keeping him from exposing his true lizard form is slowly starting to fade.

This week he decided to announce that housing benefits should be cut for those under 25. A rather sweeping and generalised statement and an extreme that even he admitted wouldn’t be achievable till he wiped the Lib Dems off the face of the planet and seized absolute power.

A short fictional interview to illustrate a point

Person: Mr. Cameron why the under 25’s? Why are they not allowed to have financial support with their homes?

Mr. Cameron: Well they should spend this time-saving, staying with their parents will be a good opportunity to do this.

Person: But with house prices rising and banks not loaning (because they are absolutely ballsed up and maybe you should be focusing your attention on this first) reports are saying that in this generation it looks as thought people will be in their mid to late 30’s before being able to buy. How long do you want people to stay at home?

Cameron:  Well until they can move out.

Person:  But if they have no help leaving home and potentially being closer to jobs how are people meant to save to buy a place of their own and if no one is buying will this not screw the economy even further.

Cameron: Don’t be silly doesn’t everyone earn millions a year? All my friends do, they can afford homes.

Person: What about people who have moved out at a young age to go to university or receive other training? How do you expect them to live once their studies are completed.

Cameron: Well to be perfectly honest with you, these young people don’t vote so I don’t actually give a flying fuck about them or anyone north of Leicester.

Person: What do you actually hope to achieve?

Cameron: To make it seem as though anyone receiving any sort of benefits is an evil leach and to make it look as though we are saving some money somewhere because I have been banging on about the deficit for so long.

Person: Are you not worried about people being homeless? Or staying in abusive homes as they have no options of escape?

Cameron: Well if they die we don’t have to pay them any benefits, more money saved. A job well done I say.

And really that is what it comes down to, Cameron will screw over anyone who doesn’t vote so that he can help those that do. This isn’t a man or a party with the nations interest at heart but his own selfish desire to feel important. I bet he was bullied at school. I also bet his tongue is tired from all the asses he rims.


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